“A Few Haiku (24)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#139)

snow in hut shadow
bitter heart
refuses to melt

…..

(#140)

abandoned nest
filled with drifted snow
sorrow incubates

…..

(#141)

frozen tracks
my past waits for me
up the road

…..

(#142)

frigid pond
thirsty fox waits in the woods
as I break the ice

…..

(#143)

chilly winter breaths
heron, kitsune and I
speak common tongue

…..

(#144)

no sun no moon
earth in funeral wrappings
all hope is lost

“A Few Haiku (23)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#133)

winter blizzard
mountain’s clouded mind confused
avalanche of thoughts

…..

(#134)

my life stains the page
complicated crimson kanji
too obscure to read

…..

(#135)

arctic kitsune
little blizzard stalks the drifts
crimson raicho plumes

…..

(#136)

darkest winter night
echoes of abandoned prayers
dwindle in the void

…..

(#137)

wind and sea and sky
permanence of change
impermanence of life

…..

(#138)

snow on footbridge
heron tracks the only sign
of life that matters

“A Few Haiku (22)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#127)

serrated sea shells
flay unfeeling fleeing feet
my numb soul bleeds out

…..

(#128)

bits of blue shell
and broken soul mark my fall
from heaven’s nest

…..

(#129)

old pond and ocean
renewed with each thunderstorm
my soul begs for rain

…..

(#130)

your name etched
on every cobblestone
this road leads nowhere

…..

(#131)

frost on suisen
sheen of wistful memories
melts too quickly

…..

(#132)

buds on barren twigs
kanji writ on sleeping trees
promise of the spring

“A Few Haiku (21)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#121)

old rain barrel
dark waters of
forgotten dreams

…..

(#122)

first snow
white kiku on
autumn’s casket

…..

(#123)

stone cairns
mark my future; stone heart
marks my past

…..

(#124)

no more songbirds
nest in my heart
your voice fades

…..

(#125)

old mountain’s silence
questions answered
as I climb the path

…..

(#126)

rain turns to hail
my heart takes a pounding
from my tears

“Exhale”

“Exhale”
(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

A handful of words hastily shaken
Thrown like dice against a filthy brick wall
Skittering across deserted sidewalk
Bouncing into foul gutter rill
Profound thoughts from a tired mind

Is this all I have to say and if so
Does it even matter when no one cares
These words buoyant as a waterlogged corpse
Sink slowly beneath the surface
Of a world bereft of conscience

I mix metaphor and stark imagery
Insert heart and soul, blood and torrid tears
Craft a paper boat to launch on oceans
Of antiquity and futures
Yet to be and watch as it sinks

Words fall like proverbial autumn leaves
Raked into pretentious piles of damp dross
To become compost to feed the dull worms
Of bitter earth and mindless murk
Where nothing echoes but darkness

I have shouted from the tops of mountains
I have whispered in sepulchral shadows
I have groaned in blackened pits of despair
I have lost my voice so often
I can no longer hear my thoughts

Sharpened edges of serrated starlight
A thousand vapid cuts my soul bleeds out
I offer up my penance to the gods
Ragged blood-soaked sheaves of parchment
Etched with runes of my existence

It is not sufficient for redemption
For what are words but empty utterance
The fetid breaths of wretched souls exhaled
As dying light slips languidly
Beyond aloof eternity

“A Few Haiku (20)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#115)

where once was laughter
now only bones
the burned forest

…..

(#116)

does the mantis pray
for long life and happiness
it receives neither

…..

(#117)

some live some die
I plant the seeds
anyway

…..

(#118)

slender-fingered hands
reach through trees, caress my face
the rising moon

…..

(#19)

heron on the bridge
watches incuriously
as my tears fall

…..

(#120)

as a boy I knew
the sun; as a man I can’t
recognize his face

“Koto no Yume”

“Koto no Yume”
(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

In dreamland forests of my soul I hear
What deafened ears in waking cannot know
A yearning in konara groves
That lilts in silent soft-edged shadows calls

The stream conversing with the hart has hushed
Its liquid-silver voice now mute
As herons ankle-deep in currents pause
And reverently bow in pious prayer

The insects cease their gossip in the ferns
And in anticipation preen their wings
As purple katakuri nod
At crimson higanbana through the leaves

And sly kitsune slinks from trunk to trunk
A flash of pale white-flickered tail
To find a seat ‘neath green-leafed momiji
Or ‘neath the needled kuromatsu boughs

And in my dream the forest holds its breath
Eternity descends upon the trees
And all who love and care for them
As gilded god-beams light the mossy stage

Then from the forest depths there comes a sound
That filters through the canopy
A song that renders deafened hearing moot
A song heard not with ears but with the heart

The stirring notes of strings plucked heavenly
By fingers blessed by goddesses above
A visionary eloquence
My koto no yume, my koto dream

Then, riding on the sunlit motes, appears
A glowing form adorned in hues
Of wild flowers, seas of green, sky blue
A maiden of unspeakable allure

This tennyo who deigns to entertain
Floats lithely in her hagoromo garb
Her feathered kimono as fair
And bright as golden taiyoko above

Her voice then whispers softly and with care
And all the world has ceased its spin
As ocean tides and fragrant winds stand still
To listen and to learn and understand

She sings of wondrous beauty as her voice
Begins to rise and fall among the trees
Her lyrics tell a tale of life
And loss and sorrow and redemptive hope

And as her words fall gently to the ground
She spreads her arms and looks at me
Her voice a solemn tone as koto fades
And tears the tinct of summer rainstorms fall

“These woods,” she says, “and all that live herein
And all the earth and sea and sky above
Are gifts to you and in your care
But paradise is fleeting, sunset looms…”

And in my dream I watch the forest fade
As oceans rise and skies turn dark
And animals lie choking on the fumes
Of human hubris, and the figure says,

“The choice is yours, but tarry not…farewell…”
And she is gone and I awake to find
Myself alone in midnight thoughts
And listen for the strains of koto strings

But all I hear is silence in the night
And all I see as I peer through
My open window is the waning moon
As it paints with a sterling brush the trees

Of distant woods and stream and meadowland
And since my ears are deaf, I use my heart
I close my eyes and breathe in deep
To reconnect with nature once again

Then faintly as a forest sigh I hear
The somber song of koto strings
And opening my eyes I see the streak
Of sleek kitsune tail cross the lea

And hart emerging from the sleeping woods
And herons winging slowly past the moon
And in my heart the choice is clear
My koto no yume, my koto dream

“A Few Haiku (19)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#109)

I cast my old net
But time swims by so swiftly
I can’t catch my breath

…..

(#110)

Silver waves arrayed
In blue moon-hued solitude
In both sea and sky

…..

(#111)

These old woods have felt
My grand-father’s father’s feet
Walking through the ferns

…..

(#112)

Hoarfrost memories
Moonless midnights freeze my soul
Crystallize my tears

…..

(#113)

There is warmth inside
Near the hearth so why must I
Choose the frigid night

…..

(#114)

Snow covers my tracks
I cannot go back again
All things lie ahead

“Winds of Sorrow”

“Winds of Sorrow”
(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

My beloved kiku lay in withered waste
Yet their ivory tears still fall
Drift against the sides of my heart
Winter’s woeful weeping

In the northernmost climes
The bitter wind howls in my soul
Frigid lamentations haunt me
Hokkaido’s kanashimi no kaze

Winds of sorrow have frozen me in place
My mind flees on grey heron’s wings
Far away from this futile life
From this land of sadness

There is only whiteness
The aimlessness of a long life
Poorly lived, poorly loved, a life
Bereft of meaning, bereft of color

I can no longer remember the sun
The green of konara copse gone
Faded as the ferns have faded
Spring grass now dusky dun

Memories of flowers
Cause my heart to seize in my chest
There are no more lotus blossoms
Only shifting shadows on lifeless pond

Past the willows, past the stream, bamboo groves
Stand dead and haunted as yurei
Beat strange tattoos on hollow husks
Disappear in darkness

My hut is deserted
Now a silent chill resides there
Only empty bed and one chair
At the table where I broke bread alone

No matter where my mind takes me there is
A sense of a world in mourning
Earth comes to a stop, all life gone
Naught left but winter’s tears

And yet I still endure
Wake each day to a barren world
Pass my time in haze of regrets
Wait for callous night with its numbing dreams

And yearn for winter’s end
Which never comes

“A Tanka Trio (10)”

(c) 2021 by Michael L. Utley

(#28)

Sere crone winter sheds
Iced waraji at the door
Hangs her hiemal veil
On the windows, frigid laugh
Desecrates the sacred place

…..

(#29)

Shima-enaga
Silver-throated winter-borne
Yuki no tori
Huddle in Hokkaido chill
Little clouds alight on branch

…..

(#30)

Weeping winter’s tears
Cannot cloak in drifts the rift
Between earth and man
Frigid hearts and bitter souls
Bury world in human shame