“From Tsukiko, While Watching the Moon”

On By Mike U.In Poetry

“From Tsukiko, While Watching the Moon”
© 2025 by Michael L. Utley

I have waited long enough
among midnight forests
and somnolent bamboo groves
the furtive whispers
of pensive yurei
a forlorn supplication
to dissolve further
into the rayless world
of lost souls
to seek the sleep
of bōkyaku

cloistered among
susurrating reeds
I bathe my feet
in Sanzu’s nocturnal tears
adorned in fragrant
willow shadows
as koi drowse
in the depths of dreams
and kitsune slink
clandestinely
their night-thoughts
unfathomable

the red footbridge
dun and sullen
in this half-light
recedes into nothingness
an abandoned relic
leading to nowhere
its purpose forgotten
another ghost in this
world of ghosts

beyond the bridge
emptiness

somewhere out there
lies a buried memory
the bones of a life
once lived
once lost
forever regretted
a recollection unknown to all
but mindless breeze
and insentient earth

above
insensate stars spin
upon eternal axes
their astral trajectories
a testament to futility
their presence neither
proof nor denial
of divinity
alignment
retrogradation
degradation
collapse
blackness
silence
eternity in the
blink of an eye

oh, but you, arrogant moon
gōman’na tsuki
skulking through the trees
your cold light casting you
as villainous
your spectral aria
a surreptitious siren-song
I must resist
oh, moon
your dubious countenance
burned into my soul
your serrated sickle’s
jagged tracks still scarred
across my pallid wrists

you don’t know me, moon
in your hubris
you assume all things
in your haughtiness
you presume to decide
the fates of men
your judgments
surpassing Enma’s
in their brackish cruelty
your domain the darkness
and all who dwell within
you of many faces
and the tongues of serpents
beguiler of hearts and minds
you don’t know me, moon

but I know you

you named me Tsukiko
birthed me in
the gloom of obscurity
flung me upon Fuji’s flanks
and fled
moon-child
daughter of Tsuki
I have watched you
all my life
from afar I contemplated
your shifting phases
your covert risings and fallings
your feckless betrayals
your eldritch gleam

and I waited
for acknowledgment
for recognition
for the simple pleasure
of moon-dapples
on lotus ponds
and still I wait

you don’t know me, moon
and you never shall
for now I embrace my fate
and begin my journey
into the tenebrous aether
of oblivion
no more shall I hope
for that which you cannot give
no more shall my tears
blind me to the truth
no more shall my dead heart
ache from your rejection

I am Tsukiko no more

48 thoughts on ““From Tsukiko, While Watching the Moon””

  8. rajkkhoja's avatar rajkkhoja

    somewhere out therelies a buried memorythe bones of a lifeonce livedonce lostforever regretteda recollection unknown to allbut mindless breezeand insentient earth… Sounded & powerful.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  10. Your poem is beautiful, Mike! Moon greatly inspires poetry. It inspired many ancient Chinese poets. Here’s one I memoried as a kid.

    “Thoughts in the Silent Night”, by Li Bai (701 – 762), the most famous Tang dynasty poets of all time

    床前明月光，

    疑是地上霜。

    举头望明月，

    低头思故乡。

    TRANSLATION

    Moonlight reflects off the front of my bed.

    Could it actually be the frost on the ground?

    I look up to view the bright moon,

    And look down to reminisce about my hometown.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

    1. Thank you, Miriam. I have a few poems about the moon (and several haiku). This one is a bit of an aberration in that I portrayed the moon as being a villain. Most of my moon poetry expresses my adoration of the moon.

      The Chinese poem you shared is beautiful! How I wish I could understand the Chinese (and Japanese) language. I’d love to be able to read poetry written in the original languages. I’ve actually heard of Li Bai on another writer friend’s blog. Should you have any other recommendations regarding Chinese poetry, do let me know. I’d be delighted to discover more. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

    1. You’re very kind, Cassa. Thank you so much for this generous comment. I am so enamored with Asian culture, art and landscapes (and cuisine). I have so much respect and admiration for these lands and their people. I love learning about Asian mythologies and reading the work of Asian poets. My bucket list includes traveling through a few Asian countries, something I know will never happen, but it’s a wonderful dream of mine.

      I appreciate your constant support as always, my friend. A happy Sunday to you. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  13. I needed to keep my google page open for this one, Mike – first reading with to understand the mythology and then reading it for its pure beauty. The moon can seem villainous, the stars indifferent to the mortal lives down here. But I still love her permanence. It’s something that tells me not to worry – not all things can be ruined by mankind. So happy to see another 2025 poem!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Thanks, Diana. I love the moon, too. This poem sort of took off in its own direction. Sometimes even those we love and revere can betray us, ignore us, let us down. There’s a lot of extremely personal subtext in this piece that no one else could possibly understand without walking around in my skin for a while. When I finished it and re-read it a few times while editing, I was startled to discover I had written about my own spiritual journey in a round-about way, without even realizing it. It certainly wasn’t my intent, but sometimes my poems (and fiction from years ago, as well as my photography) end up with subconscious themes. It’s a part of creation that really fascinates me. So, betrayal, loneliness, isolation, resignation, and acceptance that things aren’t the way I’d hoped them to be… Does this ever happen when you write? Hidden subtexts that stand out only after you’ve completed a piece?

      Plus, the title has a kind of interesting background… 😊

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

      1. Oh yes. I’ve excised some old demons that I lugged around for decades. I’m not surprised that your poetry is revealing parts of your life and journey to you, as well as providing insights. Poetry is powerful and you seem fearless, Mike, a necessity when exploring the complex mines of the our human being. In my experience, with each discovery there’s a little bit of letting go of what cannot be, a little more peace with what is, and a little more space for something new.

        Liked by 2 people

  14. This is truly a stunning written where the sun doesn’t shine but leaves
    Question and admiration in every chilling word. We have a journalist friend who mapped a Chinese woman and I’m not sure if they are here or there. I’m going to send this astonishing poem to him and see what insight s they might share if it’s ok with you!
    You move hearts and souls always!💓👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽💓💓💓🙌🏽

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. It’s very kind of you, Cindy. You’re always so incredibly supportive. Sure, feel free to forward this poem to your friends. The references in the poem relate to Japanese mythology, however, rather than Chinese, but perhaps your friends might enjoy the poem anyway. It would be interesting to learn the Chinese mythological analogues to these Japanese references. Glad to know you enjoyed this one, dear friend. Hope your day is going well! 😊

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

  15. It’s my pleasure Mike! You never know and that brought to mind a Japanese friend/ writer. I’ll send it off to her too! It would be fascinating and it makes our world smaller that we might appreciate we are more the same than different unless executed for having our own mind. Ugh!! 😩

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Here’s to a smaller world, for sure! We truly are all in this together. We can all learn to love one another; I don’ think it’s impossible. Unlikely, perhaps, but not impossible. Just take a look around our little WordPress community, right? Global kindness and compassion. 😊❤️🌎

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

    1. Thanks so much, Peggy. You know me and my strange, dark poetry by now, right? It just seems to be the best way for me to explore my life, and despite the sometimes bleak themes and imagery, I really enjoy writing this type of poetry. I appreciate your kind support as always, my friend. I hope your week is going well. 😊

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

      1. Hope your week is going well, too! We actually hit 70 degrees yesterday! Crazy weather!
        Many of us go through dark times, I have, and reading your poetry gives us connection with someone. We don’t feel so alone and can acknowledge our own feelings.

        Keep writing, my friend, your gifts are a gift to others. 😊

        Liked by 2 people

  17. Pingback: From Tsukiko, While Watching the Moon – Reviewed | Adam Fenner

  18. Michael, your poem moves with a quiet inevitability, drawing the reader into a mythic and deeply personal world. The slow unraveling of identity, the weight of waiting, and the final rejection of the past all build toward an ending that lingers.
    I regularly review past and present poetry, and I’ve shared your poem, which you can find at this link. I am looking forward to reading more of your work. Best, Adam

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Thank you so much, Adam. It’s an honor to see my work reviewed by you. Your analysis was spot-on in every regard (I even bookmarked the page, I was so pleased by your review). I’m deeply intrigued by Japanese culture, art, poetry, landscapes and mythology and have several Japanese-themed poems on my blog. It’s my way of showing my admiration and respect for this fascinating culture.

      Thanks again for your kindness in showcasing my poem. Very much appreciated. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  19. Mike, this piece is so familiar and the red bridge as well. I think I might have been traveling when I read this and unable to comment. The place we stay was a cotton gin built in the 1800’s and it has been restored but sometimes the internet does not work well.

    I even remember reading the comments and thinking how beautiful they were. This piece is just outstanding, and I, like Diana, remember not understanding much of what I was reading without looking up what it meant and I think I could never get back in. Anyway, just a brilliant piece of writing my friend.

    Stunning. What an amazing piece. The review was extremely helpful and brought so much more understanding to me in terms of my knowledge of much of the terminology. Thank you to Adam.

    Blessings Mike and thank you for another exquisitely written piece.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    1. Kindest thanks, Joni. Yes, it’s a complicated piece. I wanted to explore some Japanese mythological equivalences to places like Lethe and the concept of lost souls (spirits = ghosts = yurei) and the difficulty of letting go and accepting our fates. Sometimes I like to challenge my readers a little bit! Adams review/analysis is brilliant and I’m glad you were able to enjoy it at last.

      Wishing you and Scott a good week ahead, my friend. 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

  20. Pingback: Adam Fenner reviews my poem “From Tsukiko, While Watching the Moon” – Silent Pariah

Leave a reply to jonicaggiano Cancel reply